i MON da farm, part two


Seven days on da farm flew by so quickly that I almost didn’t notice the high level of blood in my alcohol. The hangover from my leaving party in England was almost gone so it was about time to hit the booze again. And after such a long time, it was expected to be big and full of amazing memories!

Andy from England and Seb (his real name is Laurent actually but Sebastien seems to fit him more) from France had decided to leave our farmily and hit the road again so it was a great reason to have „a few drinks“. I’m not sure if it was because of the heat and tiredness of all of us after such an „exhausting“ day at work or because of the six-and-half-percent golden beverage but somehow our little party turned into a massive piss up. I’m not surprised that Arnon chickened out and sent his brother and nephew to drink with us instead 🙂


When I beat everyone at this cool card game Yuniv, we started to play different games. Drinking games, yaaay! 9pm, the thermometer still stuck at number 30, millions of mosquitos trying to suck up the last traces of blood left in our alcohol system, seven people sitting around a table with an endless number of empty beer bottles. That was the atmosphere which led us up to „never have I ever“. Everyone knows that after a few rounds, this game always turns into something crazy and dirty. But Arnon’s nephew literally killed it.

„Never have I ever shot anyone in their back and killed them,“ said with a poker face and took a sip of his drink. We were really having a lot of fun, people were dancing, singing and laughing but the moment he said it, everyone went completely quiet. When he told us that he did it because someone had stolen a bottle of water from his shop, we considered to be best to just go to our bamboo huts and pretend we’re not there. Everyone wished they had a gun on them just like Andy who’d found one casually chilling in the corner of his room.


When we found out the same person was going to drive us to Myanmar border to see a refugee camp, we became a bit worried. Actually, it wouldn’t have been that bad if Arnon hadn’t told us that they cut each other’s throats on almost daily basis but „we don’t have to be afraid because they have a lot of guns“. When our truck took a right turn from the main road on to something that looked like the road of death, the looks on our faces were priceless. No one said a single word and we weren’t quite sure what to expect.


 It looked very lively in the camp though! Most of the people were refugees from Korea who didn’t speak any Thai (damn, just when I just learnt my first Thai words) and the way of their life was very simple. Little bamboo huts, no hygiene whatsoever, they used the water from the river nearby and the closest source of electricity was miles away. It was really sad to see something like that but it made me think about (and maybe change a bit) the way I live. In the end, I’m actually happy for this experience and if it wasn’t for Arnon, I’d have never get an opportunity to go to a place like this.


And there’s more just-because-of-da-farm stories. I don’t think there’s many people lucky enough to have spent the celebration of the Thai New year (Songkran) with a Thai family in a rural area. We drove the truck to one of the cleanest lakes (still very dirty though) in the village and stole hundreds litres of water that we carried back in literally everything we found on the farm that was holeless (and if it wasn’t, tissues or auntie Sellotape fixed it). We kept on splashing the water for hours not only on the farmily but mostly on cars going past the farm on the road nearby. We finished the day in style when we drove „to see Arnon’s friend living just down the road“ and after two hours of driving (!!!) while being completely soaking wet, we got to this little river on Myanmar border to find out that Arnon’s friend probably doesn’t exist because he was nowhere to be seen and Arnon never mentioned him again 🙂 At least we got a chance to build a sand castle in the most malaria area in Thailand without having a mosquito spray on us (and being bitten like thousands of times). Also, like a proper retard, I managed to accidentally drink quite a lot of that dirty water that was being splashed literally everywhere and had to spend the next 24 hours near the toilet 😀

DSCF0641 DSCF0639

I was really not feeling great at all, the only thing I wanted to do was sleep. Two volunteers had moved to my room the day before though and unfortunately there was probably something very special about cat-allergic Maggie when a pregnant cat decided to successfully keep breaking into our room until 3am because obviously it was the coolest place on the farm to give birth. It turned out that Mario was the most responsible and caring of all of us though. Uncle Google turned him into a proper vet in just a few hours. However, around 5 am he decided to take a break from cat-gyneocology and sleep for a few minutes before the first rooster starts singing the lovely song. As predicted, in the morning, we found the exhausted cat lying next to her four kittens nextdoor. Arnon was very happy about it as it’s meant to bring luck to the farm because they were born on New Year’s 🙂

I really don’t understand where all ten days on the farm had gone but it was time to say good bye. Mario and I had a lot in common so we decided to travel to the south together, saying good bye to Arnon became very emotional, little Pao even had tears in his eyes and Maggie left the farm like a proper American cowgirl when she found out it’s not the best idea to stand between two fighting horses because there is no other escape from there than taking an unvoluntary and fast two metres long flight with a very hard landing. Luckily, nothing serious happened to her apart from having a few rainbowy bruises on her freckly legs 🙂 Good bye, farmily!!!



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s